In the week that saw me pass my driving test and get a new tattoo I also went to see Idles at Brighton Dome.

Now, a lot has been written about Idles in recent months, and what we can see is a theme emerging. Love.

I’m by no means an expert on the ins and outs of the band, not like some of my AFGang mates (more of that later) so this blog will not give you the history of the band or finer detail of their back catalogue but it will tell you how they make me feel.

I first discovered the band through my husband who was desperate to get a ticket for their last show at Concorde 2, Brighton. We were having a drink in town when we spotted a group of people wearing Idles T shirts. I asked them if they knew anyone that was selling tickets. They said their friend was feeling a bit fragile so maybe but come along to The Sidewinder later as there is a meet up before the gig. In the meantime if you join this Facebook page for fans, there maybe more info on there.

So, up to The Sidewinder and we’ve entered another world. People that seem like us, but with the glitter, gold, badges and band merch maxed right up! We just shuffled in and began chatting. Alas, no tickets so far. Bear in mind, I still didn’t even know this band or the meaning behind everyone’s outfits but I was just going with it! One guy we chatted to suggested we walk down to the Concorde with them and maybe someone would be selling them outside. By this time, my husband had a lead and was meeting someone down there.

On the walk down to The Concorde, we were chatting to one guy who was busying himself on his phone as we were talking. Next thing, he’s got me a ticket! I just need to queue up with him. My husband was waiting outside to meet his contact. In what other world would I have walked into a club with a man I’d never met, on the promise of a ticket for a band I’ve never heard of? This world, it would seem! Before I knew it, my husband was in and we were good to go! Oh, and these tickets were offered to us for free, part of the AFGang philosophy of paying it forward, it would seem.

What you’ll have noticed here is that I’m still talking about last year’s gig, but I’m building it up, I promise! What I saw at The Concorde was amazing. I could see that, but I didn’t know any of the songs so was a bit bemused by predominantly middle aged men in band T shirts shouting their hearts out about a man called Danny Nedelko? Never heard of him!

I could see and feel the love in the room and the interaction with the band was amazing. I couldn’t wait until I could sing along with everyone else! I felt part of something but not really sure what.

Fast forward then to this tour and I’m wearing my rainbow t shirt with my badges gathered nicely. I’ve become one of them! The band’s singer Joe Talbot has designed a new set of rainbow based merch, so of course, that’s what we’ll wear! How many times has this gang been referred to as a cult?! Joking, not joking.

All is Love is technically a fan page on Facebook, of which there are of course many. The fans are known as AFGang. This group is different. Think of the fan groups you used to be a member of when you were younger. Yeh, it’s not that. It’s not the Dennis the Menace fan club, you won’t get a free Gnasher Snapper. However if you were to the post on the page that you’d always wanted one, you could guarantee that one would turn up in the post a few days later!

This group does what it says on the tin. All is Love. Grown men talking openly about their mental health, strangers offering guidance and support almost immediately. Some cliches yes, but ones you learn to love. “You’ve got this”, “we’ve got your back”. Sometimes the posts can seem overwhelming. Sometimes over indulgent. The responses though are always fuelled by love. Respect. Time. Which is often all that someone is asking for.

Meeting at Bison Beer, North Road this time and they couldn’t have been more welcoming. I’d done my best to prep them for what to expect. “You’ll know it’s us”, I said. Walking in, I recognised some people that I’ve chatted to indirectly on the page and it’s hugs all round! Like meeting an old mate. My husband had to come and get me at one point as I was loving walking round and saying hi to so many likeminded folks, I might have forgotten at one point he was there 😬

Am I actually going to talk about the gig? Almost there! Brighton Dome is over the road so a hop skip and a jump later and we’re there. As I’m enjoying hanging out with my husband, brother and sister in law we stay in the foyer while Crows are on ( I know, I know) which gives me time to check out the merch. At what stage did I start buying merch again? And when did I start calling it merch? For me, it was a lovely tote bag, very sturdy, expandable, everything you need in a tote.

To the gig then. As I said earlier, my job here is not to analyse the gig but to tell you about my experience. I’ve always loved watching bands coming onto the stage, get a sense of how they’re feeling. Are they genuinely enjoying it? Does it all seem a bit of a chore? Here, you want to watch everyone else too. How is them coming onto the stage making everyone else feel? Well, you can feel it, see it. Everyone is THERE. It really feels like Idles are OURS. I don’t mean that in a weird possessive way. They are there for us, to talk to us, engage with us. We laugh with them, cry with them and of course sing with them! Idles fans are the best singers! Knowing the words to every single song, singing along like you do when you’re at your mates house and your favourite song comes on! That is what it’s like! At a massive party with all your mates playing your best tunes.

When Bobo comes into the crowd as he does more than once, you can see how in awe of him people are. The sheer mechanics of being able to negotiate your way into the crowd, still playing, still attached to a lead. All whilst wearing only your pants, breathtaking.

Lee, looking like he’s been given a guitar for the first time, and been told he can play at Brighton Dome if he likes. So joyous! When he’s in the crowd with Bobo and tells you to get down, of course you do. Not that it’s a cult. Joking, not joking.

Jon, drummer extraordinaire. My friend joked he didn’t fit in because he didn’t have a beard and tattoos. Don’t worry, you’ve got Jon. And look at him. Holding it all together like his life depended on it.

Dev, I have to say is the one I know least about. There will be some AFGangers disgusted by this admittance. It’s true I’m afraid. I will try harder. I see him in the same vein as Jon though, keeping it all together while the kids go out and play.

So then there’s Joe. The frontman. And that’s exactly what he is. Out there, talking to you, embracing you, making you feel like, actually, I was right all along, kindness and compassion are nice qualities to have after all. Here is this man effin and jeffin his way through songs about love, compassion, kindness, inclusivity. We were right! What an affirmation to have. To be in a room with thousands of people who also feel this way. To be part of something.

The songs are amazing though. I’ve always loved a sing-along and Idles certainly provide that, but the lyrics and the power of the songs makes me feel that every time I sing along I’m somehow making some kind of difference, that change is possible. I felt that at the gig. I hope that Idles publish a book of their lyrics. A great read makes you laugh and cry with all manner of emotions in between, which is exactly what they do.

Throughout my career I was told I was too nice, soft, a pushover. I have slowly learnt that being those things does not make me weak and I am stronger for it!

So I haven’t given you a rundown of all the songs, I haven’t even told you how great my new tattoo looked when pumping my fist in the air 👌

I wanted to tell you about my experience of seeing Idles and how I have grown as a fan. It truly is an experience, and I don’t only mean seeing them live. Being a fan is an experience, meeting fans is an experience. It is unlike anything else. The fans are so invested. It’s like they’re living by a set of Idles values. Remember though, it’s not a cult. Joking not joking. 👌

As I sit on the train on a miserable Monday morning, I reflect on the weekend. Dry January is over and I’m off to see Tim Burgess!

I first saw Tim with The Charlatans at least 20 years ago at Rock City in Nottingham. I thought that was the last time until my husband reminded me we had seen them at Brighton Dome, sorry Tim 😬

To add to the excitement of a night out for just me and my husband, we thought it would be fun to book a cheap hotel for the night. We then wouldn’t have to worry about disturbing the in-laws when we got back. Cheap, certainly not cheerful.

So far, I’d only had a glass of Prosecco, didn’t want to show myself up after a month of not drinking, plus I had a driving lesson the next day. Of course, they didn’t have that in the venue, so it was onto lager.

The venue was beautiful, a church with amazing ceilings and plenty of space. Before Tim came on, indie music was playing and I thought, this would be perfect for an indie disco!

The crowd was probably about my age, if not a bit older. This seems to be the case now with most gigs I go to now which is fine, we’re all clinging on together! Also mostly men, seemingly more excited at seeing Tim than you would perhaps think, particularly the man who insisted on waving to him all night. It was as if he had an important message he needed to give him: “Tim, you left your straighteners on! Tim, did you feed the dog?!”

The taxi driver even told me there were lots of men out tonight, as he repeatedly apologised for calling me “fella”.

Tim’s lovely, singing as if he’s a child being allowed to play out in the snow, rosy cheeks and beaming wide smile. Even when the feedback was unbearable, he kept smiling until sorted.

Wearing a boiler suit and trainers with his now trademark bleached Andy Warhol style hair, Tim’s looking ageless. I have to say I didn’t know all of his songs, but I was certainly happy to watch. There were no Charlatans songs but I did catch a Culture Club cover. Who knew?

We had been told that after the gig, Tim would be out to sign his albums. So, like the giddy gig goers we are, we waited. True to form, Tim came over. You could say he ran over. He then took control of selling and signing his vinyl before posing for the obligatory photo. Now with his bobble hat on, he’s looking even more pleased with himself, particularly when he meets my husband 😆

With the gig over, what to do next on our crazy night out? We walk past a couple of grim looking pubs, one with a massive queue and decide to head back to the hotel. Enough excitement for one night!

The hotel is horrible but it’s time to ourselves and is perfectly located on the seafront. So, after a cup of tea and a bit of Graham Norton, it’s off to bed.

What a nice mid-forties night out!